I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled

July 22nd, 2003 § Five comments

Today is my twenty-fifth birthday. I am old, old, old. A quarter of a century old. Man, that is old.

Now that I’m not in my early twenties any more, I need to find ways to preserve my rapidly-dwindling youthful vigor for as long as possible. My ideas so far:

  • Sleep in a vat of formaldehyde
  • Read fewer books about city planning and more issues of Teen People
  • Part my hair behind
  • Dare to eat a peach
  • Drink the blood of newborn babies carrot juice

Any other suggestions?

Five comments

  • dumptruck says:

    eat ice cream for breakfast every day (you can wash it down with the carrot juice). and get botox injections all over your body.

  • C-dawg says:

    I don’t think getting a graduate degree allows you to remain “young” and if you ever get your PhD, I’m going to start calling you professor, even if you are only 29.

  • Jeff says:

    No! I am not a Ph.D. student, nor was meant to be;
    Am a masters student, one that will do
    to read Jane Jacobs, plan a town or two.

  • christine says:

    Happy belated birthday! Um… I say wear your brother’s colorful clothes. That should take a few years off.

  • Brian says:

    The secret to eternal youth is eternal goofiness. Or so I hope.

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